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Many will recall the riotous adventures experienced last year by the Clubhouse Tailgate in dealing with Catch-17. The marvelously-devious Catch-17 stated that RVs must have a parking permit to park in Lot 17, then the designated RV lot, unless one had a parking permit, in which case it could not park in Lot 17. Enacting Catch-17 enabled those in the Virginia Tech administration responsible for traffic snafus to snarl campus traffic as long lines of RVs waited alongside busy streets in order to enter an empty parking lot. Reasonable people presumed that the level of bureaucratic incompetence displayed in creating Catch-17 had set the bar as low as it could possibly go. Reasonable people were wrong.

How about forgetting about RV parking altogether? Yep, that would do it. And that is exactly what Tech did. It sure made Catch-17 seem like a hoot.

This year, the beautiful minds charged with head-scratching over finding ways and places to park the tens of thousands of vehicles that descend on Virginia Tech loaded with fans desiring to observe the Hokies in action had decreed that the increasing numbers of recreational vehicles, having outgrown Lot 17, be moved to the portion of the parking lot off of Price’s Fork Road where commuter students park during school days. For the first three games of the 2008 season, things had been working fairly well.

That, of course, was before a school day intersected with Gameday.

The Tech parking mavens had forgotten or otherwise neglected to mark off that portion of the lot used for RVs. Commuter students arriving for class that morning parked there as usual. RV owners and operators then arrived at the time instructed by Tech, noon, to find no parking available. Catch-17 had been trumped!

The not unreasonable question posed by the RV crowd of ‘Where do we park?’ seemed to utterly discombobulate Tech’s Parking Disservices. Meetings were quickly held to attempt to figure out where to stash the homeless homes on wheels. The League of Nations convening to attempt to figure out what to do about those pesky Germans pops to mind.

To get the RVs off of what were becoming increasingly busy campus streets, owners were told to park at the nearby campus inn. This was not a long-term solution, or even a short-term one, as folks paying hundreds of dollars to stay at Tech’s high-dollar alumni center were not altogether thrilled to arrive and find a bunch of RVs hogging their parking.

Other suggestions were thrown out. Parking the RVs at the still-empty Lot 17 was pondered, then rejected as being too easy. There was the Drillfield, but Tech’s Food Services would have lost major business as students flocked to the Clubhouse Kitchen.

Somebody finally came up with the brilliant idea of getting the darn things off campus by parking them at the Tech airport. This was considered an excellent solution, what with the long and flat runways, perfect for RV camping. After it was pointed out that the problem of planes crashing into RVs parked on the runways might distract attention from the game, it was noticed that there was a private football parking lot located next to the airport. Problem solved!

The RVs packed up and headed across campus like a wagon train westward, finally decamping out of sight and mind of Parking Disservices. They were consoled by Tech’s Director of Gameday Snafus Tom Gaffer, who exclaimed, “Whoops! Sorry about that. At least Tech won.”

Ah, yes, the game. Unlike RV parking, Tech did manage to remember that a game was scheduled. It’s a wonder. Tech won, due in large part to the Tech coaching staff remembering that the foundation for all of Frank’s success had been based on the ground game and the Maryland coaching staff forgetting how to defend it. Darren Evans and Tech’s much-maligned offensive line had a much better day than did Parking Disservices.

The win allowed Tech to remain somewhere near the top of the ACC’s Coastal Division. What is the worst Tech team in over a decade is still, incredibly, in control of its own destiny as it stages an improbable attempt at defending its ACC football crown. There is something to be said for playing in a lousy conference, along with Butch’s rank inability to beat Frank.

Tech’s next challenge is a challenging Thursday night game at Miami. There will be plenty of parking available, unlike what happened last Thursday night at Tech.

There are three games left in Tech’s regular season, two at home. Fortunately, both will be on a Saturday. Barring a quick return to the Saturday classes ended thirty-eight years ago, parking should be more plentiful without the commuting students gumming up the works [what do they think Tech is, anyway, a college or something?]. Still, Tom Gaffer might want to place a big sign over his desk that reads: Don’t forget about the RVs.

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