The Return of the A-Line Board of Football Experts
This deserves special recognition.
Author : Mitchell (IP: 22.214.171.124 , pool-71-176-235-236.rcmdva.fios.verizon.net)
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This article shows how truly old you are I’m guessing 90…These uniforms look sweet…I generates great amounts of revenue which is always good and it gets recruits. You know who havent changed their uniform in a while…Virginia and how many games are they winning recently…I’m not saying this is the only reason we get recruits but it is a help. I am also guessing that you where the same black suit, white shirt, and black tie to work everyday.
Tech’s original school colors were black and gray. Like the first state-supported name of the school, the Virginia Agricultural and Mechanical College, they were soon discarded for today’s orange and maroon. It had been assumed that the black had been relegated to history’s dustbin. That was an incorrect assumption.
The black and gray colors were derived from the uniform worn by the cadets of that day. There was opposition and derision almost immediately, the chief complaint being that the uniform colors were too similar to prison colors. The prison garb was discarded and what had been today’s Burnt Orange and Chicago Maroon was decided upon. Who knew that in a little over one hundred years, Mike Vick would eventually wear both?
Some time back, Tech signed an apparel contract with Nike. In return for boatloads of cash, Nike was given the right to garb Tech in whatever new creation emerged from Their Bad Taste Department. The result has been seemingly a new uniform every week, most all even more garish than the last.
Many of us thought that Nike could not possibly come up with worse-looking uniforms than they had draped Tech with in the past. It turns out we were wrong about that.
Nike recently unveiled its new ‘Pro Combat System of Dress’ for so-called ‘elite’ football programs, which seems to include Tech. While it might seem that use of the word ‘combat’ to describe clothing worn by kids playing games while the country is at war is utterly tasteless, it doesn’t seem to faze the shoe mavens. Also, using ‘pro’ to describe a college uniform seems a hoot given what happened at USC and what is going on at North Carolina, but irony doesn’t seem to be Nike’s strong suit, either.
Included among Nike’s ‘Pro Combat System of Dress’ is their latest exercise in attempting to dress the Tech football team in the most ridiculous manner possible. Words that pop to mind when gazing at this abomination include ‘hideous’ and ‘ghastly.’ Suddenly Oregon’s absurd uniform combinations don’t seem so bad anymore.
Perhaps a tactical advantage can be gained at FedEx from these god-awful jerseys. There is the possibility that the Boise players will be too busy pointing and laughing at Tech’s attire to concentrate on football. Then again, it might not seem so bad to guys who play their home games on a blue field.
The real reason for all of these uniform shenanigans is to separate dollars from the young and gullible. Right on cue, those who make their living from the sale of Tech-related merchandise announced the latest fashion creation to emerge from Chinese sweat shops. Snappy, huh? Or something.
The hope is that tens of thousands of Hokies will be so afraid of the negative peer pressure that will come from not wearing the absolute latest that they will rush right out and buy what is hopefully a one-of-a-kind t-shirt. And, while the wallet is out, also purchase shirts designating this year’s White Out, Orange Effect, Maroon Effect, Lunch Pail Day, Skipper Effect, Hokiestone Effect, Lousy Taste Day and whatever else springs from the fertile marketing minds located in Jamerson and Beaverton. While there may indeed be many Hokies who are at this moment beating on retail doors demanding to hand Tech even more money than that required for the ACC’s most expensive season tickets, I know of one who is not.
Over the years, I have proven remarkably resistance to Tech’s entreaties to join the in crowd and buy an Effect du jour shirt. After 50+ years of watching Tech football, the number I have bought so far totals 0. I see no reason to change, especially for something so repellent as the current black shirt with its odious orange lettering. I have laid out a fair amount of cash the last couple of weeks buying some new attire. Included were my preferred Gameday apparel of the polo shirt along with a rain slicker and sweat shirt [and I had to search high and low to find one without the urban gangster-themed hoodie attached]. All are in maroon, which, if memory serves me correctly, is Tech’s dominant color. Or was, anyway.
I’ll pass on the atrocious black. I will take my chances on being the only one in what we are assured will be a sea of Hokies in FedEx wearing maroon instead of the trendy black. It won’t bother me in the slightest. I suspect I won’t be the only one not wearing black, but am willing to risk fashion ostracizing.
With Tech now guaranteed to have the ugliest uniforms of all that will be televised over this season-opening weekend, one does wonder: What will be next? As Tech’s uniforms become more and more outrageous, will, by the Hoo game, the players take the field wearing over-sized shoes and carrying water bottles to squirt in the faces of London’s crew? Will the bottles at least be maroon? It seems the logical conclusion; no doubt Tech and Nike will be strongly encouraging us to purchase the game-specific Clarabell the Clown Effect gear.
Once upon a time, Tech wore for every home game what I considered the sharpest color combination around, maroon jerseys with white numbers and pants. Those days sure seem quaint in this modern era of The Uglier the Better uniform determination. Tech ditched the black color back around 1896 for what I consider good reasons. Unfortunately, that has now become the minority view. See you in FedEx next Monday. I will be the guy in maroon.